by Elize Webb

I have now been married to a wonderful man for more than 30 years. We have three daughters and two sons (two of the girls are married now and brought home two wonderful sons!)

My husband lost all hearing in his right ear when he developed hearing complications, following a diagnosis of mumps at the age of 5 years. His other ear, at the time, was left with 80% hearing.

I met my husband at the age of 19 years, when we started our university studies. Since I can remember in our lifetime together, I have always walked on his left-hand side. I am so conditioned after 35 years together, that I now find it impossible to walk next to other people on their right-hand side! I still remember in our early years of marriage, the ENT specialist told us that later, in our forties (which at the time seemed so far in the future), my husband will start losing all his hearing and that we need to prepare for it, as ageing is not kind to our hearing ability (same as sight), as it deteriorates over time. The left ear, which worked hard for a lifetime of some hearing ability, as predicted, started giving problems in our forties, to such an extent that he needed a hearing aid.

The problem with hearing aids is that they are so advanced nowadays, that they are both powerful and very small!  And no-one usually looks behind someone’s ear, except for your Mom who cleaned you when you were young! So most people are not aware of a person’s disability, and therefore it is not taken into account in daily living. It is thus a disability with very little visibility.

With regards to his hearing aid (of course he only needs one, as the other ear is completely non-functional), three separate incidents in the rooms of Ms Henriëtte Moolman at Kosmos hospital, eMalahleni, stands out for me:

  1. The first hearing aid – I can still remember the first time his hearing improved so much by getting his first hearing aid. He suffered from headaches, due to the improved awareness of his surroundings and sound in general.
  2. The first bi-cross – I still remember the first time he was fitted with a new design, where both ears received an ear-piece, but the one (acting as a receiver) was connected to the other (the real hearing aid) via Bluetooth, allowing my husband to hear “stereo” for the first time that he can remember…  Our youngest daughter had to speak to him, from behind a door, on the right side of his body (the deaf side). When he heard her voice on his right side, he was confused, surprised and elated, all at the same time. Believe me, it was magic, tears flowed in the consultation room… (Remember he was 5 years old when he lost his hearing; thus pre-school)

  3. The latest bi-cross  – This was a magical day last year, as with the latest technology, he was able to fit a new Oticon apparatus – his personal favourite hearing aid (he says the sound is just the best, as it represents sound the most similar to the human voice). These two apparatus, also with Bluetooth functionality, resulted in him having to switch to an iPhone, as the APP that accompanies the hearing aid only exists for the iPhone. He loves the iPhone app, as it empowered him to be in full control of his working and personal life. His calendar, all calls, all calls while driving, essentially his waking life – all are managed by the app.

Gratitude goes to our audiologist, Ms Moolman, who has ever since our journey together has started, always just had his ability to continuously hear better and better, also as his hearing ability deteriorated, at heart. 

We are now in our early fifties. Over time, I have been filled with both admiration and gratitude. Admiration for my wonderful husband, that despite difficult circumstances, that I cannot ever completely comprehend, managed to live a successful life – at his workplace, as a husband to me, father to our children, son to his parents, brother to family and a friend to many. Gratitude goes to our audiologist, Ms Moolman, who has ever since our journey together has started, always just had his ability to continuously hear better and better, also as his hearing ability deteriorated, at heart. She has truly gone the extra mile to fit the latest-on-the-market hearing aids, the sharing of a new app, and has always provided us with both mental and physical support. She has been the backbone of his hearing disability journey and also the journey for us as a family. I am also grateful to the developers and technicians that are continuously looking at ways to improve the hearing aids and support to people living with this disability, as the quality of life continues to be improved by them.

Lastly, but not least, I am grateful to God, for putting the right people in our path, for helping us to live a life with the means to afford these wonderful technologies and for helping us when we pray for help. To God goes all our praise!

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